Tuesday, December 3, 2013

IT'S ALWAYS SOMETHING

I didn't get a chance to post over the Thanksgiving holidays -- I am trying to fly under the radar with this blog.

Tuesday evening, Petunia checked herself in to inpatient psychiatry and stayed til yesterday.  Over and above the worry, I really count on her help.  On the other hand, DH and I didn't argue at all.

Thanksgiving came, and with it much drama between Mom and CW.  Sometimes I want to scream at them that this isn't middle school, it's our lives!  Mom is trying her best to get offended and dredge up and fester old hurts.  I really felt like I should have been spared, as I was already having a tough time.  But no, it's always about them.

Grammy and I took the 2 kids on the Polar Express on Friday night and then I had the kids spend the night.  We had tons of fun - and it wasn't too cold.  It was Rosebud and DSIL anniversary on Friday.

Sometimes, I just want a stinking break from all the drama.  Since Petunia's gig was a total surprise to me (and much worse than simple psychosis), now I feel unbalanced.  I'll be crisis habituated again for a long time.  It robs me of enjoying the present, because I never know when the crisis will hit.  It makes me feel like anything and everything can/will fall apart.

You are really the only one I had to talk to - and understood the mom and CW thing.  Sometimes just having someone to talk to can relieve a lot of my stress.  I've been seriously thinking of going back to therapy....I'd need a new therapist and it's exhausting to explain everything.

I'm losing my sense of humor....

A bright spot:  Today is Pippy's 5th birthday.  Where does the time go???

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