Dear Mrs. Jones,
Forty-one years ago today, you married First Husband. I don't think we ever had a fight after that. He seemed like an OK choice at the time -- you were still reeling from ConMan's death in March. I didn't understand what you saw in First Husband, but he was kind and funny. Dad said you just didn't want to go to school, or work, and so you got married. That may have been true; people marry for fewer reasons than that.
You lived very close to my dorm, and I saw you all the time. One of my most clear memories is you and I biking to the OB-GYN in the round building (still standing!) on 5th West to take a pregnancy test. It was negative, but you were sure you were pregnant. Turns out you were -- but you never showed positive on the test. Later, after you moved to Billings, MT you had a horrific miscarriage. You probably had infection that resulted in your inability to get pregnant or carry a child. Funny - you could've had a 40 year old!!
The marriage was at the Grandparents' place - it was HOT! Everything was outside and the cake almost melted off the plate! After you and FH left, the huge fight began, and there was never a good resolution, even 8 years later.
All this seems so real and recent to me. It's not something to bring up to Mom (it will stir the hornet's nest) or CW (she likely remembers nothing). How I wish we could talk and remember the good parts of that time. I pass the old house several times a week, and I remember it so fondly.
I miss you everyday. I try to feel you near, but that rarely happens, and I'm not even sure of the times I think I do.
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